'Cuz I'll be there in the back of your mind from the day we met till you were making me cry

As a warning, this is going to be a long boy rant post.

About two and a half years ago, I was at my best friend's birthday party and I started talking to this guy there. He was funny, Jewish, dorky, great conversation, basically, my ideal type. He was there because he's best friends with my best friend's roommate. The following day at brunch with my best friend and her roommate, I casually gave her my number so that in case he asked for it, she could give it to him without making a big production of it. Sure enough, he called a few days later. This turned out to be none other than schlong boy. We went out twice and I enjoyed myself both times, but something just didn't click, it was like he was trying too hard or something, so after that we remained friends. Or rather, as I should say, I remained friends with him. He tried for a long time to get me to be his girlfriend and I kept on saying no. Finally, one day I decided to give him a chance, partly because he was a great guy (or so I thought) and partly because he was persistent. We went out a few times and then two weeks into our "relationship" I got sick.

As I've mentioned on here several times, about a year and a half ago, I got really sick and spent nearly a month in the hospital and another month on bed rest. I had open heart surgery when I was four. Unfortunately, being that this was in the Soviet Union, the hospital's medical ethics were not totally up to par and no one bothered to check to see that that cute little four year old on the table was actually awake! Thankfully I went under right after the first cut, but really, one cut was all I needed. I have many irrational fears, but because of that horrible experience, my fear of hospitals is totally 100% justified. As you can imagine, after that, I was thrilled to have to be admitted to the hospital. In the beginning, the doctors did not know what was wrong with me, and I was starting to feel like I was never going to get out of there. I was not allowed to eat anything, was miserable, and depressed. After 10 days of being there, I started to get this feeling like I was never going to be discharged. I called my so-called boyfriend and asked him to come over to visit me to try to cheer me up. I should also mention that at this point, he had just lost his job and was at home all day. His response? "I'm sorry but I can't come visit you because hospitals and sick people scare me. I hope you understand." I told him I hoped he understood why I could never see him again. He did not call me once the remaining time that I was in the hospital. Although I did get a lovely text message saying that he hoped I wasn't angry at him. That New Year's Eve he wound up being at the same party with as my best friend. He tried to apologize to her and her response basically made him cry. (Girlfriends are so much better than boyfriends at times.)

Fast forward to several months ago. He started im'ing me on gchat again and trying to talk to me. I've been responding but keeping things curt. Mainly listening to him and not really talking. The only notable exception being Friday night when he told me about his new modeling career. Ladies, do I know how to pick 'em or what? Basically, for the past month or two, he has been im'ing me constantly trying to apologize and asking me out and saying that he wants a second chance. I always cut him off before he even gets the chance to formulate an apology because at this point, I'm not all that interested in hearing what he has to say. There's a day late and a dollar short and then there's him. He has not taken the hint and has just gotten more persistent once again. What the hell is wrong with him? (Aside from several obvious characteristics.) Does he really think I want to give him another chance?